ah, activities co-chair

WARNING: this post is full of live, unadulterated emotion.

it seems i haven't really mused for awhile. i think that is what blogs are really about. i have just turned mine into a movie company...ideas, preproduction, premiere, etc.. so, a good musing vent is in order at this time. i am going to cover a lot of big themes, so hang on. i don't care if anyone reads this, im selfish. its for me.

okay. so i have a calling. activities co-chair. hmmm. i like the calling, but im pretty sure i got it because i didn't go to the activities. i decided i am conditionally social. some environments i love to be social, even crave some attention, others situation i prefer the more transparent look. well tonight we had a stake activity at the park. our ward was assigned, yup, you guess it, 'musical chairs,' actually you probably didn't guess it. so. bless my heart, the rest of the activities commitee couldn't be there, so i was lone musical man. if you didn't know this next fact about the moore, take note, because it is ingrained deep within us. when we are given a task, WE DO IT. usually it is the best we can do, but no matter what, if we say we are going to do it, we do it, or make sure it is covered. one of those good/crappy instincts. anywho. i show up there tonight to find only one other person i know. literally. at least it was someone to talk to during dinner...he probably felt the same way. two others trickled in, so that was good. they then announced that we would have be having activities. i guess that was my cue to go and be musical. retriving my stereo and killer mix cd specifically designed for optimal musical chairs (i told you we do things perfect) i made my way to where i placed my chairs all facing out. something was wrong, they were all facing in! with people in them! crap. so i explained that i had to kick them out because we needed to play musical chairs (BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT I WAS ASKED TO DO, AND DANGIT IM DOING IT.) so they nicely moved. i went to turn on my stereo to find that the batteries i bought at the dollar store weren't strong enough! (cheapness bites me again.) so i stupidly have to ask around for an extension cord. by a miracle i found a girl that had 2! so, i followed her to the car, not making eye contact with the group i condemned to the grass, they all most likely cursing me for making up "musical chairs" because i didn't want them in my seats. well. i got the cords, but they were super short and civilian, so we had to move the game. my nice ward helped their poor special ed activites co-chair move the game. now. i have a question for you all? how do you recruit people to play musical chairs? i know. i didn't really know either. after yelling like a lunatic to all that couldn't help but hear that musical chairs had officially begun (suprisingly no lines formed...) i decided to work with what i had. 2 girls from my ward and 3 girls that were in it for the candy. round one. good. round two, two of the candy girls dogged out saying that they feared they would kill each other (they were sisters.) gradually it was working, more and more people were coming over! but heaven forbid that providence shine upon me. no, it came alright, but in the form of water warfare. wouldn't you know it, but some OTHER ward decided to begin their activity of water balloons with my cute fortress of chairs as the focal point. this of course is not a good selling point for an already outcasted game. i temporarily closed down the game to save those that had helped me. i told them it was kind of like israel. on hold until the war was done. luckily they waited around until it was done, oh wait. no they didn't. i don't blame them. this is really where the story begins. there i was ALL BY MYSELF with a slew of white chairs and a water splashed stereo paused on a song from austin powers. "great" i thought. i waited around for a few minutes trying to see if anyone would come up and ask me to please open up the game again they wanted so desparately to play. seeing that that never happened, i told the man in charge that people weren't exactly flocking to musical chairs. he said to close it down and go and "mingle!" okay. so i closed 'er down. starts at 6pm, ends at 9pm. it is now 7:45ish. "mingle. mingle, i can do that," i thought. confidently i walked around to find people i knew to talk to. no one. well, maybe if i walk around some more, some will appear. nada. so i tried just sitting on a picnic table. no dice. i gave people looks...they looked away. suddenly i had fallen into 'water drinking mode.' this means i would just make my rounds, get a cup of water, and then drink it en route to get another cup. it was something to do. this was my mental thought at the time. "man, do i miss holly." fearing i would burst my bladder, i laid off of the water route and looked for something else. i needed to blend in. i saw some outcast girls that looked like they needed some friends, so i decided to be the nice guy and say hello. well. sat down, tapped into their conversation, realized that they were perfectly fine and cooler than me...they had plans to DO something after. i never said a word to them. now. you are thinking, "why didn't he leave when his game got voted off the island?" because of the MOORE HONOR CODE. THE FLYER SAID THEY NEEDED MODERATE CLEAN UP AT THE END AND DANGIT IM FULFILLING IT IF IT KILLS ME! so. i just sat there by this group of girls. at least i blended in! this was progression. yes, i got the usual 'sprinkler turn,' where they look towards you, but quickly past you so you don't think they are looking at you. i know i was the conversation piece later on as to why the musical chairs geek sat by us, but i got to that bitter-pleasant stage of not caring. so. there i cleaned out my phone's memory and people watched. 8:15. "AAAHHHHH! WHERE ARE YOU HOLLY!" eventually the people around me left, so stuck out again. that mean't more water! off to the water only to see the now cooler than me girls, i, like the group i ousted, didn't make contant. everywhere there was groups of people socializing! it was at that moment i realized how amazing it is to actually have friends! i know you are thinking, "why the freak didn't he just go and make some friends, or leave?" well, we already know the answer to number 2, but number 1 is...YOU KNOW YOU WOULDN'T, SO WHY SHOULD I!" sat in the chair a bit more. tried to look like there were people around me...didn't work to well. 8:50pm came around...those chairs were being loaded up. but not the last two because I SAID I WOULD PARTICIPATE UNTIL 9PM. 8:58 i made my rounds. i had a bag of candy. if i kept it, i wouldn't feel right turning in the recipt for reimbursement, so set out to distribute it to the people IM SURE would have eaten it if they had known musical chairs was going on instead of those lame games like volleyball, rocket launching, slippin' slides and flirting. they were grateful for the candy, and by the end i just told the group i didn't have any friends and was trying to get friends through candy. (true story.) they just nervously laughed. probably because i didn't. 9:05 (look at me magnifying my calling!) i finished taking the last of the crap that needed to be cleaned up to the leaders truck and i was outta there! phone in hand i called all who i had meticuliously planned to call in route back home to hang out. nothing. i felt so alone. sigh. well. it looks like its playing a computer game against loudboy over the internet (no offense loudboy.) right then, in comes my roommate josh, with his ladyfriend suzanne (we named her S-izzle, or just sizzle for short) laughing and giggling as they enjoyed a nice meal together. sigh. HOLLY! so. i went in and began playing mike. after he wasted me. we talked a bit more and i wrote this. THE END

(i do feel better now, but don't you hate those nights where you know it is lame, but you don't feel like making a difference in it? this was one of those nights.)